We are supposed to be happy when we are in love and not the other way round. Anyone who loves should be delighted to see their partner happy. However, this is different in a toxic relationship. It is about power games and emotional blackmail, which is very much to the detriment of one partner. That is why it is not tolerable to remain in a toxic relationship in the long term.
1. Your partner takes advantage of your weaknesses.
Instead of your partner helping you or making you feel better about your insecurities, they use them against you, especially when both of you have an argument. They may also use your weaknesses to manipulate you to their advantage. That shouldn’t be a relationship you should continue with. It is better to let go and find someone who values and cherishes you.
2. Everything you do is not good enough.
One major sign that you are in a toxic relationship is; no matter how much you do to please your partner, it is never good enough. There is always something wrong. They constantly make you feel bad, and you will start doubting yourself as a result of this. You will also no longer be able to access yourself whether you are doing something right or not.
3. Lack of emotional intimacy
Intimacy is another hallmark of a toxic relationship. This does not only mean the sexual aspect but also, or even above all, the emotional one. Only when both partners open up, trust the other and thus make themselves vulnerable can real closeness and, at some point, love arise. If one of the partners shuts off this intimacy, a healthy and fulfilling relationship cannot develop.
4. You neglect your family and friends.
Your best friends no longer ask you if you want to do something with them, and you can’t even remember the last time you visited your family or friends. By now, you should notice for yourself that something is wrong here. Your relationship has taken you over, and you are anything but happy—high time to change something because that sounds pretty toxic.
5. You stop caring for yourself.
In a toxic relationship, you may stop doing things that are good for you. Maybe you stopped doing hobbies that give you happiness, or you are neglecting your health. That doesn’t necessarily have to be a wrong signal, especially at the beginning. Many couples in love cannot get enough of each other in the beginning and ignore everything else.
But if your partner is constantly asking you to do things they love and are not even trying to do the things you love, you should pay attention. In a loving relationship, each party involved should get the other person’s best interest at heart. It shouldn’t be selfish. Only-me attitude has no place in a healthy relationship. Everything revolves around them, and they are indifferent to you, do not notice, see or feel when you are feeling bad.
6. Communication is stuck
Your partner may be having a bad day but refuses to tell you. Instead, it goes away for a while and pulls back, leaving you wondering if you did something wrong. A manipulative partner will accuse you of pressuring them to confide in you and sometimes even throw wild insults at you. They go out partying on the weekend and refuse to tell you about it because what you think doesn’t matter one bit to them. And you’re back home alone.
What to do in a toxic relationship
It is important to recognize that you are in a toxic relationship. If others recognize a pathological pattern, it helps address the problem, but the affected partner must come to this knowledge themselves.
To get your life back on track, openly address the fact that you have been in a toxic relationship with friends and family. In this way, understanding is awakened, and conversations about it will help at the same time. Psychotherapy can also help to come to terms with what you have experienced and strengthen your self-esteem again.
Photo by Eric Ward on Unsplash