Marriage is a big responsibility and, for many couples, it takes time to internalize the fact especially financially speaking. The reason for this is, for the majority of their life, they have gotten so used to tending to their own needs and spending money for themselves. The moment they decide to get married, steadily, they are being introduced to a higher level of financial responsibility.
More and more, they realize that the overused expression “Money cannot buy happiness.” is not, at all, true. Although their contentment with their message must never be based on how much money they have, money still is a huge determinant of how stable their relationship can be.
The lack of which is ultimately detrimental to the health of their marriage and keeps them from moving forward with their plans of forming a family. Here are several tips couples can heed for a long-lasting and the stablest relationship:
The dating stage is the best time to get to know each other’s financial values. There is nothing wrong with the man paying for all dates, but so goes challenging this traditional idea. If you take turns paying for meals out and shopping, this could help nurture a habit of being financially accountable for each other and being considerate of the other before finalizing big-ticket expenses.
Then, comes the wedding expenses when the mutual respect you’ve developed for each other’s financial needs will come in handy. Deciding who pays for the venue reservation, banquet, transportation of guests, the cake, rings, and the bridal gown or dress shouldn’t be a big issue if you’re transparent with your financial capacity with each other. A man insisting on shouldering all expenses when he is not exactly in a financial position to do so would only brew discontentment in the marriage later on.
Overall, it is best to be honest on money matters with each other early on in the relationship. Again, money should never be the sole basis for starting and continuing a relationship but it could even be more beneficial for both of you to know ahead of each other’s financial capacity and be self-aware of how well you can provide your partner’s needs with yours. Setting things right and proving both of you are financially responsible enough from the get-go will help strengthen your bond.
How your parents raised you could also highly influence how you would support your future family too. Having grown in an environment wherein all your needs were provided even if your parents went through financial struggles helps teach you the value of money and not spending it on unnecessary luxuries. A partner raised in a similar culture would most likely share practical thought processes on financial matters with you too.
Likewise, your parents constantly instilling in you a frugal mindset also is a big source of guidance once you are on your own. Being told when you were younger somewhere along the lines of enjoying your money while you are still single because you can’t anymore when you’re already married helps you to prepare for it and keeps the reality from hitting you in the face. This advice incentivizes you to not only make the most out of your youth and your income as a single person but also to make amends with the impending life where your income is already allotted for bills before you even get to think about things you would want to buy for yourself.
Clarity is still one of the main ingredients for a harmonious relationship. For regular expenses on commodities and utilities, you could open a shared bank account wherein you agree to funnel in a certain amount of your monthly income. That way, you can both keep watch of where your shared funds are going and be conscious of advising the other of any purchase you are planning to make.
Frugality is a virtue to live by once you have a family to support, and so you should save all you could. On top of saving, you should also keep in mind that you cannot avert economic risks, and so you should actively seek ways to grow your money. Although it could sound like a stretch for you and your partner given your limited monthly income, you could agree to set aside a small amount to invest every month.
This allotment, no matter how small, will compound in interest eventually and you would realize this was a wise decision. Just make sure that your savings and emergency funds aren’t dented in the process so you would not have to absorb risks more than you could manage.
Getting married is expensive not only per se, money-wise but also in terms of the trust a couple earns from each other and each other’s families. And so, those who decide to do so can only make it work.